-Productive actions will follow once you decide who you are.
All of us get stuck from time to time. Our careers or lives seem to plateau in one way or another. We get motivated to change, but things fall apart soon after.
Uncovering who you say you are.
Without realizing it, we all have an identity compromised of beliefs about who we are and what we are capable of. This identity works in the background of our mind, helping us to flourish or to fail.
Let me give you an example. I worked with a woman who was frustrated by the dead end of her career. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t advance to a leadership position with her company or find a job with another company that would give her the opportunity.
When she came to me, she expressed her frustration and anger. She was tired of being passed over by her boss and ignored by recruiters.
I asked her to complete this sentence about how she’s handled this disappointment, “I’m the kind of person who….”
Her first reaction was to say, “I’m the kind of person who gives up.”
Deciding who you want to be.
Immediately after saying that, the muscles on her face contorted. She couldn’t believe she had said that. She didn’t want to be that kind of person.
So, I asked, “What kind of person do you want to be?”
She responded, “ I want to be the kind of person who never gives up, who always finds a way!” The muscles on her face relaxed.
Acting on who you want to be.
Once you decide who you want to be, your brain will want to be consistent in action. It doesn’t like contradictions.
If you believe you can’t, you won’t. It’s just too uncomfortable for your brain to be out of its comfort zone. When you decide, with conviction, who you want to be, your brain must devise actions consistent with that identity.
I asked her to complete the following sentence. “I’m the kind of person who never gives up, who always finds a way, and so I’m going to…..
She repeated this sentence and, without hesitation, said,”…and so I’m going to ask my boss what it will take for me to get promoted!”
Our beliefs, including the hidden ones, impact our choices. This can work for our benefit or detriment. Either way, we must become aware of what we’re saying to ourselves. If it’s not productive, then it’s our responsibility to change it.
Once we do, our actions and how we carry them out will be different, with different results.
Work Your Authentic Genius.
Grow and flourish using your own intelligence!
- Where are you feeling stuck or frustrated?
- Complete the statements in regard to this situation, “I’m the kind of person who…” and then “I want to be the kind of person who…” as in the example.
- When you decide what kind of person you want to be, determine the actions that person would take by completing the statement. “I’m the kind of person who…and, so I’m going to….”
Reposted from the Authentic Success newsletter. Subscribe and don’t miss an issue!
Jo-Aynne Von Born, Executive Coach READYSETMORE